Paramilitary jawans behind a barbed wire barricade in Srinagar on Tuesday. (AFP)

Srinagar, Aug. 26: By the age of five, Ahmad could repeat most of the azaadi slogans blaring from the minarets of the Hazratbal shrine but was too young to understand what they meant.

When Kashmir plunged into full-blown militancy in the late ’80s, it didn’t take him too long to forget the slogans. But they came flooding back to his mind when the Valley erupted again over the Amarnath land row.

“Azaadi is back on my mind,” said Ahmad, who did not give his first name for fear of being marked out.

In the past two months, he has taken part in over a dozen protests. Under siege for the past three days because of curfew, he is craving another opportunity but time is running out for him.

“I am an engineering student in Delhi and have to return. But before that I want to participate in another protest. With the CRPF men standing outside my home round the clock, it seems next to impossible,” he said.

Stringent curfew, with thousands of security personnel on the streets, has been stifling Kashmir for the past three days to prevent young men like Ahmad from stepping out and swelling the ranks of pro-azaadi demonstrators.

But it is causing great hardship to many others who, like Ahmad, may be influenced by the protests but unlike him have more immediate priorities. Many ordinary Kashmiris are without milk, vegetables, even bread.

“We have seen curfews before but this time the security forces are being particularly ruthless, preventing us from even stepping out of our homes. They are not in the least bothered whether we have food at home,” said Ghulam Fatima, a retired government teacher, in Bohri Kadal.

Even hospital employees and journalists, normally allowed free movement, are suffering.

“It’s as if emergency has been imposed. For the past three days, no newspaper has been published in Kashmir because our employees have not been able to reach our offices. Some of us have curfew passes but they are not being honoured,” said Ghulam Hassan Kalloo, president, Kashmir Press Association.

“Many journalists have been beaten up. In the past, militants would occasionally force our papers to close; this is the first time the government is doing it.”

Patients are finding it hard to reach hospitals. Officials said the forces beat up over a dozen ambulance drivers and damaged some of the vehicles.

Ishtiyaq Ahmad, an employee at the Lal Ded hospital, said policemen thrashed him outside the National Institute of Technology gate. “My office sent a vehicle for me but I was severely beaten up by the police though I showed my identity card,” he said.

The situation today prompted patients’ attendants to protest at Lal Ded, Kashmir’s only maternity hospital. “There is no food or medicine here. Where shall we go?” asked Rattan Kour, a patient from Fujipora, Budgam.

Unfazed by these hardships, Ahmad is looking for a relaxation in curfew to give “vent to his anger”.

“During the past 20 years, I have seen people get killed here and atrocities by the security forces. They saddened me but never encouraged me to join the protests. This time it is different,” said Ahmad, whose good looks once encouraged him to look for a career in modelling.

“I spent many months modelling. But in the world of glamour your only concern is yourself. For the first time now, I have realised that some things are more important,” he said.

Accumulated grievances, real or perceived, have spurred him to take a pro-active role in the protests. He narrowly escaped bullets while leading one at Hazratbal.

“When you are in Delhi, you are viewed with suspicion. There are, of course, good people but you have to convince everybody that you have no militant connection. You don’t get a flat and when you do, the rates are exorbitant,” he said.

Ahmad’s opposition to the allotment of land to the Amarnath shrine board stems from fear that it is a move to “change the demography of the state”.

“It is not just a question of 800 kanals (40 acres) of land. The shrine board had plans to fence the entire area from Sonamarg to Pahalgam, which stretches several hundred square kilometres. This means a state within a state was to be created and that I would have had to ask their permission to enter that area,” he claimed.

The “excessive” use of force is tempting him to defy the curfew and participate in the protests. “There were protests in both Kashmir and Jammu. Police (firing) has killed three people in Jammu during the past two months and 36 in Kashmir,” he said.

That was the count till yesterday. Two people injured in yesterday’s firing died today, raising the toll to 38. There were several protests during the day but no deaths were reported in today’s police action.

Zareef Ahmad Zareef, a poet and educator, said young men born just before militancy began in 1989 or after that are at the forefront of these protests.

“They have seen everything with their own eyes. The previous generation had picked up arms but did not know what they were up to. The new generation has taken a conscious decision. And they have picked up more potent weapons: stones not firearms,” he said.